car

Calvin's favourite word is still "car". Zack gets annoyed now and shouts, "train. train. train.", when Calvin means train. Sigh. You get used to it tho'.
This evening while Zack was bathing, I sat with Calvin while he played with the garage and his cars. The light was beautiful, so I got quite a few lovely shots. Here are just two.

payback time

Mrs Sweby at Montessori Nursery, N10 sent me my deposit back by cheque today. Will attempt to deposit it.

drunk and disorderly

So it all came to a head last week Monday. After four sessions of "settling in" at a North London Montessori nursery nearby, I took Calvin to his first day. Dropped him off at 1:30pm and when I turned up to collect him at 4:55pm there was this strange old crone sitting in the kid's play room. She looked awful, gaunt and sallow. She had grey blotches under her eyes and across her nose. I really wasn't sure who she was or why she had all the staff sitting in a circle around her. Her skirt was hoiked up, and her legs akimbo. A part of me was already scrambling through the ID parade... she was probably the owner. Then she spoke and I was right, it was the owner who'd I'd only spoken to on the phone. She was going on and on about ofsted and the parents, and how she couldn't do enough for them. I said, "Excuse me?" but I couldn't understand what she was saying. I was looking around the room, from face to face, at each member of staff. All I got was blank stares or averted eyes.
In the meantime Calvin had seen me, stood up and was walking towards me. His face said scared and unhappy. I grabbed him and slung him onto my hip. By now I'd caught one of the girls (who I'd chatted to the previous week) rolling her eyes. Yup, I could smell the booze at 2metres. So I guessed A + B = blotto.

The end of it all : I've pulled Calvin out of the nursery. He's going to go to Zack's full-day nursery from mid-September.

No point in being stupid about this. Two weeks ago my gut feel was "there is something weird here with the staff". Yes, the peer pressure amongst fellow North London mummies was that Calvin should only attend a half-day session BUT I cannot have my child in THAT nursery. Zack's little nursery - Greygates - is just lovely. The staff turnover is neglible and they are genuinely affectionate, well trained, career child-carers. I don't have a qualm about sending him there other than the long hours. I was only trying to be "open minded" by going for the Montessori. It failed. There you go. Now we're onto plan B, which really should have been plan A.

closer to being me

I took Calvin to nursery this morning for his 4th and final session of "settling in". It meant 1/2 an hour of being with him, and then 1/2 an hour of being there without me. When I kissed him goodbye and left, he was terribly upset, but in 5 minutes time I'll go back and see that he's OK. I'm sure it'll take a bit of time because he can be very clingy when he wants to be. The steady process of becoming more independent continues - for both mum and child.
Mum on the other hand cannot wait !

Empty Apologies

Today I decided to sit out of Zack's ball class so that I could read my book. Afterward we came skipping out of class and were fooling around on the steps outside when one of the mums called to me and said, "Your son hit my son....", so I called Zack over to apologize. His first reaction was, "... but Mom, he hit me first", and when the other mother denied it, he said, "But he did! I saw him."
I find these sorts of conversations frustrating. Zack apologized and hugged the other boy. I then paused, waiting for the other mother to reciprocate. She didn't. Her son just did the sulky quiet thing and rubbed his eye.
I don't think Zack was lying. I do think that the other mother possibly heard her son cry or wail, but I can't say that she saw Zack actually hit her son OR for that matter, her son hitting Zack in the first place. So who's in the wrong? Is Zack a bully or just a normal boisterous boy? Is her son a manipulative little git or a cry-baby, or was he genuinely injured during a tousle over a ball?
Zack is very gracious for apologizing, even if it is difficult in the moment. It doesn't cost alot to apologize and it's a good skill for later on.

worse before it's better

nasty nasty nasty

at least we can get some joy out of a bowl of raisins!

and we pass it on

Early days in Calvin's bout of chicken pox. It worsened considerably and we were only getting sleep between 4am and 7:30am at one point. Thankfully I think we've turned the corner. Sigh. exhausting

bloomin 'eck

So we go off on holiday with granny and grandpa. It's stressful. We travel to Berlin first. On the evening of our first day, Zack has a few small bumps on him. It's been extremely hot so it could be heat rash. Nope, the next morning we know for sure - it's chickenpox.

bank hols in berkies

Zack went off to the doctor on Monday and then again on Friday last week - ear infection. He's on amoxycilin. It meant the first night of our holiday (Fri) was a no sleep night and we had to take it in turns to comfort him. Thankfully by the second night we had a solid night's rest. Now Calvin is taking his turn to cry - he's been chewing his fingers for the past few days, so perhaps he's teething. He certainly has the icky bum to go with it, but no temp. Sigh. Kids. I'm tired.

Calvin is happiest on the slide

those jolly rides in shopping malls - there's no escaping them [sigh]

what can I say ?

Brothers take a walk

no sleep

Mummy and Daddy are zombies at the moment - Calvin is waking up twice and even three times a night to have a wail. Mostly I get up, but I'm getting to the point where he can just cry if I've been up twice before. I feel bad for the neighbours, but I need a bit of pity too. Poor Keith is also feeling haggard with the sleepless nights (and he's suffering from insomnia) and all the stresses and strains at work. His plate is pretty full right now.
I'm really not sure what's causing the wakefulness, but all the boxes are ticked - clean nappy, not thirsty, dummy nearby, warm, quiet. Either he's lonely or he's bored. We are going to move his cot into Zack's room so that we solve the former, but the latter is something that will have to find it's own way out because neither Keith nor I are entertainers at 1am, 4am or 5:30am. No way!
Zack and Calvin went off to Little Dinosaurs yesterday, and when I got home I heard that Zack had bitten a two-year-old. Sheesh! How long has it been since he last bit a child ? Ages and ages. He had rushed upstairs when I was talking to Tina about it, and I found him hiding underneath his bed. I went up and sat on the floor and encouraged him to come out. He was obviously afraid of what I was going to say, and apologized immediately. Now that he's older, it's easier to ask, 'Why?'. The other child was hitting him in the face. I reminded him that he needs to talk to an adult. Biting is not an option.
Calvin, Zack and I went off to the shoe shop on Tuesday and got new shoes for both of them. It is remarkable how quickly children's feet grow. Zack is now an 11, so needed to say farewell to his Gola's. I replaced them with a pair of funky white Sketchers. Calvin got his first pair of walking shoes - little navy-blue, leather ones. He seems happy in them, altho' he is reverting to crawling every now and then which is understandable.
I took Calvin to the physio on Monday morning at 9am for an assessment. Considering he'd been walking for nearly a week, I felt that my fears had been allayed and I really didn't need to be there. As it turns out she was happy to see us, but confirmed just that - he is doing well developmentally and doesn't have any issues of concern. That little outward turning foot of his will soon be straighter with the shoes and constant walking.

he walks

Calvin has FINALLY decided to walk by himself. Yesterday while at a shopping mall in Derby he walked for quite a distance with Keith (just keeping him company, not holding his hands). It is delightful - he holds both arms out in front of him like a zombie or Frankenstein, and giggles as he goes. I'll try and post a video of it soon.

spring

April hath put a spirit of youth in everything. ~William Shakespeare

This week has been most springy. You gotta know how bad the winter's been if spring is getting an entire blog mention here. We have been on the trampoline twice most days, have weeded the lawn extensively (tho' it still requires more), and Keith and Zack have planted white pansies and new rosemary bushes. Zack was given some vegetable seeds to sow. They are now in their own little "greenhouse" box, germinating. Kids are so impatient. He went and looked this morning only to see that nothing had changed.
Keith helped Zack cycle around the block at lunchtime. I then invited him to cycle with me, all downhill, to a friend's house. He was eager for the first 100 metres. Then it was whining and moaning. Between Keith pushing the pram AND Zack's bike, and my pushing both my bike AND Zacks' we got it there. Unfortunately that meant we had to repeat the exercise coming home. Bike confidence is a slow process I fear. I am trying inordinately hard to not repeat the impatience of my father, and to be as empathetic as possible.

Calvin's first real word

He said it on the weekend and I thought it was just fluke, but this morning when I picked him up, I said, "Let's have some breakfast Calvin". And he looked at me, so I said, "lunch", and he said to me, "lunch". So there it is - Calvin's first word, other than "mummy, daddy, and nanny", is "lunch". I think he might also be on the verge of "'nana" (as in 'banana'), but we'll see.
My child is a genius !

Easter and the dregs of the birthday

Calvin's first conscious Easter, and Zack's first genuine Easter Egg hunt. By Sunday afternoon, Zack said to me, "Mommy I don't want any more chocolate". So allowing him to indulge had the desired effect... I'm getting clever - reverse psychology does work you see.

The sheer delight of discovery

the motherload

devouring the booty

We decided to spend Easter Monday at a National Trust property offering Easter Egg trails for kids. It was a hit, and tired them out with all the hunting for eggs, stamps and signs. We finished the afternoon with lunch at the Smith & Western in Boxhill. Kids were knackered and we'd had some quality time with Jax, Claudio and Alessio.

Easter Monday with Alessio at Polsden Lacey (National Trust Prop)

Zack gets the 'Easter Bunny' treatment at Polsden Lacey

Cat in the Hat ? - that's what this face reminds me of.

Last weekend was Anokye's 4th birthday party, and all four of the NCT girls were in the same place at the same time. Amazing. It was a wonderful sunny day and we spent most of it in the garden with the kids jumping on the bouncy castle. Keith and Calvin had some quality time together too, and they took the camera, so I don't have any pics of Anokye's party. Oh dear.

Calvin and Keith hit the playground together

Spiderman birthday party with fab masks from Walmart - what a winner!

The Willars sisters in trendy superhero outfits - Buzz Lightyear and retro Thunderbirds.

A delighted, exhausted, happy, very hot & sweaty birthday boy.

Hours of baking and icing amounted to a single layer, chocolate, Spiderman mask cake

Now we are Four

The much anticipated purchase of the bicycle for Zack's 4th birthday is now a moment in our collective memories. He loves it and even went so far as to ride it in the dining room, lounge and on the deck outside. He is yearning for better weather so that he can get out on it. I don't think the "stabilisers" are going to be around for very long...

Zack is 4

Four is a very big deal when you're little. It means so many things. I think Zack anticipated an enormous change when he got to his fourth birthday, and now it's alot of waiting for it to happen. He still has six months until school starts.
His birthday was marked with present opening, eating porridge for breakfast (his favourite), playing with his friends, assembling his new toys (Lego), and making play-dough creatures. All in all it was a great day, and he was exhausted by bed time.
Today (Friday), he's took cupcakes to nursery school, AND it's his chance at show-and-tell. He couldn't contain himself, so took his Vuvuzela, two light-sabers, blue blanket, and Buzz Lightyear doll with him. It's very hard to choose just one thing to talk about.

twilight zone

I flew out to Ohio last week Thursday, with two boys in tow, to visit Keith's aunt and uncle - Joy & Mike. The flight out was horrendous. I arrived at Heathrow at 09h35 (three hours before the flight was due to depart). It took them 2 hours to issue Calvin's boarding pass as he was travelling as an "infant on lap". Apparently the system couldn't sort it out. Idiots at Continental/United Airlines have NO idea about frustration. What am I supposed to do with two children who are being forced to stand still in a ticket hall for two hours? My blood was boiling. Calvin and Zack then took it in turns to press all mommy's buttons until we got to Cleveland. I was extremely grateful for the air-stewardess on our final leg: the only helpful individual we'd met in 12 hours!
The kids had such a good time, and thoroughly enjoyed all the attention. Zack went to sleep as soon as we got there, but Calvin was wide awake and firing on all cylinders. It meant that everyone got to meet the little brother, without all the sibling rivalry that goes on during daylight hours. It was great fun and he did his little walking steps from one person to another too - what a performer! Joy and Mike were both working, so during the day we'd go to the Mall (it was bitterly cold outside), or down to a playground nearby.

Zack working his way up

The fun of sliding

Saying "Goodbye" to Joy on Tuesday morning

Calvin and James share an IKEA moment

Uncle Mike helps Calvin eat every last pea in the pot

I was feeling incredibly rough (tired, ratty and sick) when we got there, but thanks to the family I slept for a good 9 hours on the first night. I was diagnosed with 'pink eye' while I was there, so it was good to get some meds, and shake that infection (I'd been struggling to get rid of it at home). Keith arrived on Friday night, and we were able to sleep in on both Sat and Sun mornings. What a wonderful feeling! Mike doesn't sleep well, and the boys had jet-lag, so it was a win-win situation.
Zack, Calvin and I went out for hamburgers on Monday afternoon which Zack thought was a treat. He can be incredibly slow at eating - too busy watching everything else that's going on around us. He loved the ceremony of it all too, and I sent him off to the 'soda machine' to refill his own cup.
It is Zack's 4th birthday in 10 day's time and we are planning a Spiderman theme. Walmart is a wonderland of goodies, so I picked up a ton of stuff for the party. Thank goodness for huge weight allowances on US flights.
Tuesday evening was the flight home. We had a relatively uneventful trip home - no delays, no crises, no [enormous] tantrums, and a quick connection at Newark too. Zack wet his trousers sleeping, but I'd prepared for that eventuality and packed clean bottoms, and socks. Funnily enough he did comment that, "people will laugh at me with no trousers on" (I had to change him once all the other passengers had disembarked), but I reassured him that no-one could see. Funny the little things that they are concerned about all of sudden.

Race:
Zack is suddenly aware of race/ethnicity. We were in a supermarket today, and he said to me, 'That man is the same colour as Ethan and Chloe'. To which I replied, 'Yes, that's right. Anokye's daddy is also that colour.' I think he's identified the colour as 'brown'.
Then, just to throw a spanner in the works, I said to him, "So Zack, what colour do you think you are ?' I proffered some suggestions : purple, green, blue pointing at my skin. In the end he said, "I don't know Mom." So I suggested he think about it and we can talk about it again. Devils' advocate!

cat's away

Sigh... why is that the minute Keith heads off on business, the kids 'habits' degenerate ? Sleeping is the first one to go. Last night Zack was not in a hurry to go to sleep, and then woke up this morning at 5:25am having had a bad dream (he tells me that I had gone far away), and wee'd in his bed. Having calmed him, changed his pyjamas and putting a towel down on the wet patch, he then told me that he wanted to play. I was firm and said, NO. It's still night time and you must sleep. He didn't tho'. He'd woken Calvin up who was now chattering in his cot. I decided a firm line was the best, so I just went upstairs and went back to bed. Zack came up and joined me on and off, and finally went downstairs. And here's the reason for today's post - Zack put on the tv and the DVD player by himself and watched Stuart Little. I am delighted. I was able to sleep until 8:30 when Calvin woke up again. Not feeling quite as shattered as I might have.
Annoyingly I have a nasty eye infection which isn't clearing, so I'm trying to sort that out too.

totter

Calvin is now tottering along with confidence on Zack's old "push along" musical wagon thingy. He loves watching himself in the mirror and glances backwards to make sure Mummy is seeing it too. Too cute!
Yesterday morning he was playing on the carpet in our bedroom, while I was showering. He discovered a sun-beam and scampered around trying to catch it. Every time he had his back to it, it disappeared, then he'd quickly circle around so that he could see it on the carpet again.
He has a couple of new words too : Amen, and Nanny (for Tina).
This morning we were singing "Zoom, Zoom, Zoom, We're going to the moon." and he quickly started counting with his little pointer finger in the palm of the other hand, and then putting his arms in the sky at "blast off". Just so delightful to see the developmental stages.

a REAL holiday

We've been discussing, at some length, with friends how you go about having a real break when you have such little children. As we don't have grandparents around, and our attempts in 2009 failed dismally, we just want a solution. As such, I've started investigating via the net. here's what I've come up with in the UK for family holidays :

http://www.babyfriendlyboltholes.co.uk
http://www.mrandmrssmith.com/ - they have a children section
http://www.cottageselection.co.uk - "take the family" section
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/travel/holiday_type/family/article2133315.ece
http://www.childfriendly.co.uk/
http://www.bedruthan.com/hotel/

http://www.tredethick.co.uk