What the week has held

As I mentioned in the 'kaput' entry, I haven't been coping very well, at all, of late. I'm finding the full-time mummy thing a real challenge, one which gets ontop of me a little too regularly for my liking. Keith has been a honey and worked from home a few hours this week, while I've had some time to sleep. I got an extra 4 hours yesterday which felt great.

What's made me realise how rotten things are is my coping skills. Usually I get annoyed at the stupidity that i have to live with, for example... "where have I put the house keys, again?". I get really angry with myself and incredibly frustrated at the ridiculous things that I do - things that I've never done in my life. Last week, I left my keys in the car one evening, and the next morning, Keith took the only OTHER set of keys we have to work with him (well, they're on his key-ring so it's unavoidable). It would, necessarily be on the day when I CANNOT live without the car - I was leading bible study in Limehouse and looking after Caitlin. Trish was a honey and stepped up to the plate by bringing Caitlin over here, but I had to cancel on the biblestudy girls. It was just too much. Yes, friends keep saying to me, "Ruth, don't do so much. Do less!" yeah, yeah. I know I should, I just want to be me. Me would easily have coped with those two things. What's the problem ??

I can't put it down to much more than lack of sleep. My nutrition is A++ (hell, I'm eating enough fruit, veg, meat, carbs, cake, chocolate and drinking plenty of water and a cup of coffee each day). My health hasn't been good though - I've had this lingering chest and sinus infection for weeks now. Last Friday I went to the doctor for even more anti-biotics, so it looks like I may yet kick this. I've been inhaling lots of steam at night too, which aught to do the trick. I get quite depressed thinking about it all.

What makes me feel really cheerful though is Zack's little smile...


... and hugs and kisses from Keith...

... and the thought that on Wednesday morning next week I will be in Johannesburg with my mum, Andy, Kelly, mum-in-law, Sal, friends, aunts and cousins. Bring it on !!! Basically it all adds up to a bit more help.

Keith and I have chosen to live in the UK, and to drink the cup that is life here. That does mean that we have to swim solo as a little family, but there's no law against stopping at the fuel depot every now and then.

Tomorrow is Zack's big "take it off ! take it off!" day. We are having the cast off at 9:50am and then x-rays to be sure all is well. We'd appreciate your prayers and good wishes.