Ed Psych gateway

So we've been waiting for more than 6 weeks for an Educational Psychologist's assessment to be done so that we can have something more concrete to work with. And more particularly, something that ISN'T inside the psychotherapy "fold", which is where we've felt a bit trapped this past while. Seems like such a straightforward thing to find an Ed Psych and then have it done, but the wait has felt interminable and I was very relieved when Monday rolled around. Turns out she's a Clinical Psych focused on neuro-developmental assessment.
We were given her name by a friend who runs a dyslexic clinic nearby, and although I'd contacted another Ed Psych too, these people are certainly in no hurry to return your call.
Finally the day has dawned. Zack really put his best foot forward and gave it everything he had, calmly and with purpose for all of the 4 hours that it took.
The outcome will present itself in the form of an Executive Report initially, to be followed with a full Ed Psych Report in a few week's time. In the interim we've been given a final set of B.R.I.E.F. questionnaires to fill out which focus on elements that presented themselves from Monday's tests.
It seems Zack has elements of dyspraxia, and dyslexia and a very big slice of Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD) thrown into the mix. He has a low 'executive function' (read this) and low working memory. He is sensory seeking which feeds into so many of his disruptive tendencies. It's quite hard at this stage to separate the ODD, the emotional and behavioural issues in general, this 'executive function' issue, and the SPD needs, as I think the fidgeting and disruptive tendencies, may also just be his inability to sit still, and not be in other people's personal space. But he definitely is defiant because of his response when told to stop. Perhaps, with time, he'll come to understand his own foibles, and that'll make him more able to curb the things that wind people up the most. Poor little chap, it's not an easy journey.
We had a 20 page questionnaire and the school had a similar one to fill in. The SENCO's covering letter said something like :
'Dear X
The parents have been unwilling for us to appoint our own Educational Psychologist...
blah blah blah... '
Keith and I nearly blew a gasket - where the f*** do these people get off ? Honestly ! We have begged and pleaded for them to allocate resources to Zack but NO, he is not a big enough problem. He is only enough trouble for them to write letters to us about, and to put him in detention, and punish by excluding him, but they can't pick up the phone and call the local educational team and ask them to send someone or a few someones. Nope. Zack doesn't have 'special needs' and only special needs get resources. fuck fuck fuck.
It beggars belief.

One of the answers the teacher put on her questionnaire was that Zack's class mates are "fed up" with him. And I thought that was pretty honest. That really does sum up my impression of his peers' feeling toward him. No wonder he feels so lonely and isolated. I was telling the mother of the only special needs boy in his class yesterday, and she "had no idea" that Zack had any issues. She was also very surprised that he too had been invited to no birthday parties this year, just like her son.

If Zack didn't have us, fighting his corner, defending his myriad **insignificantly big enough issues**, they would write him off and not bother to sort out that fact that he can't read and he can't spell. And he doesn't have a modicum of attention required to get through school. And he constantly fidgets and touches other children. Helllooooo people !!!

I try so hard not to feel defensive.