... or less to follow, as the case may be. I just don't have the time to write - it's crissmiss and my in-laws are here. the kids are on holiday. hell, I don't even have time to wash my hair, nevermind blog.
So it's 7.40am and I'm thinking of Shrek the Halls' take on Clement Clark Moore's poem, which opens with:
"'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse;
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there;
The children were nestled all snug in their beds;..."
Altho it is now the 27th of December, the rest is true. All I can hear is the wind howling outside and the traffic noise starting to build up.
I've been lying awake in bed since 5:15am and thinking about emotional honesty and being real. How hard it is when you are a parent, to teach your children emotional honesty and to give them resilience. I'd say both my family and my in-laws have screwed up emotional worlds, so there isn't a whole lot to work with in the way of role models. I'm somewhere near the back of the queue on emotional expertise, but I would say that 4 3/4 years of therapy has taught me a thing or two.
It's been a big deal trying to get my husband to share the emotional load with me. In his family, no-one talks about how they feel. Feelings are VERY SCAREY!!!! So you don't let them out. Raising children means getting in touch with ALL your feelings - kids don't let you have anything of your own. You wanna go to the toilet, sorry, they're coming too. You wanna freak out? Yep, they're standing right there in front of you a) driving you to it, or b) watching the fall out. Every parent comes face to face with their best and their worst when rearing a child. Last week I felt like a bare-breasted Amazonian, in a corner, with my child in one arm and a sword in the other.
In our relationship, my husband doesn't do strong emotion. Nope, he leaves that to me. It was a small problem that reared its head every now and then, but it's become more of an issue as the kids have grown up. I end up being the 'angry' mommy. I'm the one who has to do the "feeling" while daddy stays calm as a cucumber. You can see how the scales tip and things fall out of kilter. It's not a healthy state of being, not long term. I get the yin-yang thing and yes, we are opposites, so it would naturally fall to being like that. I find comfort in his un-ruffleability. He loves my joie d'vivre. But there are times, when a daddy should be angry, or sad, or furious, or deflated, or down-right miserable. He no likey. I've found also that my emotional expression gets more extreme to compensate for the lack in him, which is terribly unhealthy. It ends up being mommy the crazy-lady, and daddy vanilla, eggshell, beige blob.
So! about teaching your kids emotional range, emotional health, emotional expression, elasticity, compassion and all that lies between the two polls of Nothing and Everything; How you gonna do that ?
A friend of mine blew a gasket and dumped her husband. That was 2 years ago. She'd been married for 14 years. Her parents are still married, but sit as far apart on the sofa as they possibly can. They share a bed. They don't hold hands. I spent Christmas with them, and they didn't exchange gifts. Her mother is mirroring her anxieties and frustration onto her grandchildren because she doesn't have the emotional tools to confront my friend or even just talk about her sadness and disappointment. It's all put into other people. Her father is furious but will not show it or discuss it. On the outside there's nothing to see when you talk to him - he has various hobbies in his retirement, spends an unhealthy amount of time on his iPad looking at crap. He doesn't connect emotionally with the world outside. He is an island. He seems to have a circle of friends, but is it mutual friendship or not (I suppose this is a question many of us ask, even of our "good" friends). His sibling relationship is strained - he has one sister, they don't speak much. it's her fault apparently.
So this is emotional landscape I find myself in. I need a map, or at least a compass.
Friday, December 27, 2013
Friday, December 13, 2013
porn accusations
So this week kicked off with a bomb being dropped on me. It was an unfounded accusation, and at the end of lots of investigation, we believe that our son is completely innocent. However, the days between Monday and Friday have been long and fraught with emotion.
I got an sms from a friend from school to say she'd like to have a chat about something. I said sure, when ? She said Monday after drop-off. Fine.
Monday morning we meet at the school gate, and start walking. She tells me she caught her son, the previous Thursday morning, looking at pornography on their iPad at home. He is in Zack's class.
When challenged, he declared that Zack had told him to look at the porn, and threatened to hit him if he didn't. And so she came to me...
Suffice it to say, we have looked at the search and browsing history on every device we own and their is NO evidence of visiting porn sites in the last few months. I don't believe that Zack is smart enough to hide his tracks yet. He struggles to log in to his profile sometimes, so I don't think he has the vaguest idea about deleting the browsing history or searching for cookies. If he had been up to something, we'd be able to find it with ease. Also, I know Zack, and he wears his heart on his sleeve. He wouldn't be able to cover up something like this.
In the end we decided not to raise it with Zack at all, as that would only make him want to know what his friend had done. Today Keith and I went back to the mum and said that we hadn't found anything, and that we don't believe that her son was telling the truth. We went further and asked why her son felt he should blame Zack?
This evening she made her son apologise to me. I was gracious and said, "it's OK". We need to leave it there really.
This is part of a much bigger issue in all directions. For starters, Zack has become the scapegoat in alot of stuff that happens at school - both in the classroom and on the playground.
What a week!....
(more to follow)
I got an sms from a friend from school to say she'd like to have a chat about something. I said sure, when ? She said Monday after drop-off. Fine.
Monday morning we meet at the school gate, and start walking. She tells me she caught her son, the previous Thursday morning, looking at pornography on their iPad at home. He is in Zack's class.
When challenged, he declared that Zack had told him to look at the porn, and threatened to hit him if he didn't. And so she came to me...
Suffice it to say, we have looked at the search and browsing history on every device we own and their is NO evidence of visiting porn sites in the last few months. I don't believe that Zack is smart enough to hide his tracks yet. He struggles to log in to his profile sometimes, so I don't think he has the vaguest idea about deleting the browsing history or searching for cookies. If he had been up to something, we'd be able to find it with ease. Also, I know Zack, and he wears his heart on his sleeve. He wouldn't be able to cover up something like this.
In the end we decided not to raise it with Zack at all, as that would only make him want to know what his friend had done. Today Keith and I went back to the mum and said that we hadn't found anything, and that we don't believe that her son was telling the truth. We went further and asked why her son felt he should blame Zack?
This evening she made her son apologise to me. I was gracious and said, "it's OK". We need to leave it there really.
This is part of a much bigger issue in all directions. For starters, Zack has become the scapegoat in alot of stuff that happens at school - both in the classroom and on the playground.
What a week!....
(more to follow)
Saturday, October 26, 2013
upstairs-downstairs : my own bedroom
A week or so ago, we put the boys in different bedrooms at bedtime. Zack had been having a tantrum and I just thought, "for pity's sake... Calvin needs some sleep." So I offered him the opportunity of going to sleep in our room. It was the right call - Calvin slept well, and Zack chilled out and went off to sleep eventually.
We knew we were onto something... but it took a bit of convincing...
Calvin has agreed to having his own bedroom WITHOUT a bunk bed will be just fine. Zack continues in his current bedroom, sleeping on the top of the bunkbed.
After a week of it, we're all happy with the new arrangement - bedtimes are calmer, easier to manage, everything is feeling fairer, and above all the children are sleeping well.
I guess the big question was/is : When is the right time for my kids to have their own room ? I don't think there's a definitive answer here. Some people are lucky to have the space for each child from the start, some share a bedroom until they move house to something bigger, some share a room until puberty, some until their late childhood, some forever; it's also dependent on whether you have all boys, all girls, or mixture. Honestly, I think your children just follow your lead. If there is no chance of your own space, then we all make do.
We're fortunate to have the space now, so our boys are in their own rooms. The eldest is claiming nyctophobia (fear of the dark), but has also started reading independently in bed. The youngest's flare for organising and tidying has meant a lovely tidy bedroom, which he is proud of. Hurrah !
Now all I have to do is throw away the Christmas decorations, sports gear, and spare photography boxes and Calvin will have a 'clear' bedroom....
.... not likely.
We knew we were onto something... but it took a bit of convincing...
Calvin has agreed to having his own bedroom WITHOUT a bunk bed will be just fine. Zack continues in his current bedroom, sleeping on the top of the bunkbed.
After a week of it, we're all happy with the new arrangement - bedtimes are calmer, easier to manage, everything is feeling fairer, and above all the children are sleeping well.
I guess the big question was/is : When is the right time for my kids to have their own room ? I don't think there's a definitive answer here. Some people are lucky to have the space for each child from the start, some share a bedroom until they move house to something bigger, some share a room until puberty, some until their late childhood, some forever; it's also dependent on whether you have all boys, all girls, or mixture. Honestly, I think your children just follow your lead. If there is no chance of your own space, then we all make do.
We're fortunate to have the space now, so our boys are in their own rooms. The eldest is claiming nyctophobia (fear of the dark), but has also started reading independently in bed. The youngest's flare for organising and tidying has meant a lovely tidy bedroom, which he is proud of. Hurrah !
Now all I have to do is throw away the Christmas decorations, sports gear, and spare photography boxes and Calvin will have a 'clear' bedroom....
.... not likely.
Monday, October 07, 2013
when I'm big...
an afternoon with Calvin's godparents
We're walking home from school today and Calvin declares, "When I'm big I'm going to be an artist..." and then after a short consideration, "or an astronaut".
To which Zack replied, "I'm going to be a scientist."
that's that then.
Wednesday, October 02, 2013
Letter draft
Dear Mr [school teacher/head teacher]
Zack, the crying and the tantrums :
Zack is hard work. I know - he is my son.
Zack cries and has tantrums. He is 7 1/2 years old. I find myself asking, regularly, “is this normal ?” But is that a helpful question? The truth is he IS doing these things. Now I’m asking, “What do you and I do to help him grow and cope?” I say ‘you and I’ because he spends 6 hours a day with you and 6 waking-hours with me.
In a world driven by targets and developmental goals, the starting point seems to be “Zack should be X”. eg. Zack should be able to deal with frustration at this age. Zack should be able to take it on the chin when things don’t go his way at this age. Zack shouldn’t be upset when he isn’t the centre of attention, at this age. Zack should want to be a team player. Zack should be reading better at this stage. Zack should be able to control his anger. Zack should be able to speak about what frustrates him by now. Are ALL of these statements true though ?
Teachers : the words that you say and what comes out of your mouth are a lead and give a cue to the children in your care. Zack has come home saying “[teaching assistant) called me a cry-baby” - this means Year 3 now have permission to say to “Zack, you’re a cry baby”. In the same way we give the class permission to say Alex is different, and they follow your lead, this is now a label.
Teacher’s wield enormous power and the words that they use shape the lives of those they teach. What you say becomes ‘the way it is’. I weep when I hear, and see, how Zack is actively excluding himself from what should be a normal social life at school. His saying, “my friends all hate me. They’re all mean”, makes me wonder what’s going on. He feels like an outsider, that idea is not being corrected, and he is acting that out every day. He says he has no-one to play with, that he sits on the Friendship Bench and no-one comes and asks him to join them. At the same time however, he’ll say, “only [another boy]” is my friend. It sounds horribly isolated, but is it all true? Talking to [teacher], apparently it isn’t.
Isolation v. Love and Acceptance
He’s 7 years old. He shouldn’t be feeling lonely and unloved in a class like this. His peers are a great bunch of kids. Yes, we can use platitudes like “Kids will be kids” and “Children are terribly cruel aren’t they?” - those are both true. But there’s a huge difference between ALLOWING them to be like that by fostering a culture of unkindness and cruelty through passivity; and calling on them to recognize that there’s a person inside each of them who feels lonely, and just wants a friend to play with; who cries when he doesn’t have words for what he feels. Zack is not unique in having a tantrum and crying. It seems however, that he is unique in the frequency, length and magnitude thereof.
Please can we try and find words of compassion and understanding?
There is a need and I believe we are all acting in unison on this, for clearly defined boundaries. He needs to know where the boundaries are - that he can go no further; that he’s crossed the line; that there are consequences to his actions. Punishment is outre today. Instead I hear that we have times of reflection, time out, forfeiting playtime or fun activities. This is all in keeping with what we do at home. Let’s continue to reinforce these, in unison.
He is the 2nd tallest and heaviest in your class. (One of those he has no control over, the other is something we talk about every day - making healthy choices, eating the right foods). He’s also more sensitive than he has permission to be. I don’t think any of us allow him to be sensitive - that’s why the crying illicits such a strong response in others. We all want him to TOUGHEN UP.
I recognize that it’s frustrating when he cries and has a tanty, it’s happening at home too. I feel desperate sometimes as it’s so disempowering when he “kicks off”, and in a classroom that must be even more acute. When he’s in full swing, he is unapproachable, and uncontainable. But that’s where we are.
How do we give him the tools to grow from here ? We can’t continue like this - not for our sake and sanity, the sake of his class, or most importantly, his own development - the future.
Labeling him isn’t going to help I don’t think, even if it’s the most obvious thing. We don’t say to little girls, “don’t be such a bitch” even if they say the most awful, nasty things to their friends. Yes children are unkind, but we can find ways of showing them how to be more magnanimous. If we’re teaching socially acceptable behaviour, we need to foster inclusion. Can we actively include Zack in more?
I don’t want special treatment. I wish he was invisible and beige, that he did his work, didn’t talk back, played quietly, didn’t give us any trouble at all. But that is a fantasy. I love that Zack is Zack. He is unique. But he has to learn to fit into a social setting - that he can’t be the centre of attention all the time; that he can’t have it all his own way; that he shouldn’t take what people do and say, so keenly, to heart. Does he have the tools for that ? We trying to model it at home as best we can. You provide a framework at school which synchronizes (we hope) with what we say at home. I cannot control his responses. I cannot force him to behave in a certain way – without manacles and a heavy sedative. But I can try and shape his environment, and in this I appeal to you to help me: please help him to feel accepted.
Please can we all try, together, to aid him in this.
Yours Faithfully,
------------------------------------------------------------------------
There it is. Upset and traumatized mummy writes a letter to the Head Teacher and Class Teacher. Things are completely over-dramatized, I am accusatory, I am taking this very personally. yeah yeah yeah.
Get in line. Being a Mum is f**king hard work
Zack, the crying and the tantrums :
Zack is hard work. I know - he is my son.
Zack cries and has tantrums. He is 7 1/2 years old. I find myself asking, regularly, “is this normal ?” But is that a helpful question? The truth is he IS doing these things. Now I’m asking, “What do you and I do to help him grow and cope?” I say ‘you and I’ because he spends 6 hours a day with you and 6 waking-hours with me.
In a world driven by targets and developmental goals, the starting point seems to be “Zack should be X”. eg. Zack should be able to deal with frustration at this age. Zack should be able to take it on the chin when things don’t go his way at this age. Zack shouldn’t be upset when he isn’t the centre of attention, at this age. Zack should want to be a team player. Zack should be reading better at this stage. Zack should be able to control his anger. Zack should be able to speak about what frustrates him by now. Are ALL of these statements true though ?
Teachers : the words that you say and what comes out of your mouth are a lead and give a cue to the children in your care. Zack has come home saying “[teaching assistant) called me a cry-baby” - this means Year 3 now have permission to say to “Zack, you’re a cry baby”. In the same way we give the class permission to say Alex is different, and they follow your lead, this is now a label.
Teacher’s wield enormous power and the words that they use shape the lives of those they teach. What you say becomes ‘the way it is’. I weep when I hear, and see, how Zack is actively excluding himself from what should be a normal social life at school. His saying, “my friends all hate me. They’re all mean”, makes me wonder what’s going on. He feels like an outsider, that idea is not being corrected, and he is acting that out every day. He says he has no-one to play with, that he sits on the Friendship Bench and no-one comes and asks him to join them. At the same time however, he’ll say, “only [another boy]” is my friend. It sounds horribly isolated, but is it all true? Talking to [teacher], apparently it isn’t.
Isolation v. Love and Acceptance
He’s 7 years old. He shouldn’t be feeling lonely and unloved in a class like this. His peers are a great bunch of kids. Yes, we can use platitudes like “Kids will be kids” and “Children are terribly cruel aren’t they?” - those are both true. But there’s a huge difference between ALLOWING them to be like that by fostering a culture of unkindness and cruelty through passivity; and calling on them to recognize that there’s a person inside each of them who feels lonely, and just wants a friend to play with; who cries when he doesn’t have words for what he feels. Zack is not unique in having a tantrum and crying. It seems however, that he is unique in the frequency, length and magnitude thereof.
Please can we try and find words of compassion and understanding?
There is a need and I believe we are all acting in unison on this, for clearly defined boundaries. He needs to know where the boundaries are - that he can go no further; that he’s crossed the line; that there are consequences to his actions. Punishment is outre today. Instead I hear that we have times of reflection, time out, forfeiting playtime or fun activities. This is all in keeping with what we do at home. Let’s continue to reinforce these, in unison.
He is the 2nd tallest and heaviest in your class. (One of those he has no control over, the other is something we talk about every day - making healthy choices, eating the right foods). He’s also more sensitive than he has permission to be. I don’t think any of us allow him to be sensitive - that’s why the crying illicits such a strong response in others. We all want him to TOUGHEN UP.
I recognize that it’s frustrating when he cries and has a tanty, it’s happening at home too. I feel desperate sometimes as it’s so disempowering when he “kicks off”, and in a classroom that must be even more acute. When he’s in full swing, he is unapproachable, and uncontainable. But that’s where we are.
How do we give him the tools to grow from here ? We can’t continue like this - not for our sake and sanity, the sake of his class, or most importantly, his own development - the future.
Labeling him isn’t going to help I don’t think, even if it’s the most obvious thing. We don’t say to little girls, “don’t be such a bitch” even if they say the most awful, nasty things to their friends. Yes children are unkind, but we can find ways of showing them how to be more magnanimous. If we’re teaching socially acceptable behaviour, we need to foster inclusion. Can we actively include Zack in more?
I don’t want special treatment. I wish he was invisible and beige, that he did his work, didn’t talk back, played quietly, didn’t give us any trouble at all. But that is a fantasy. I love that Zack is Zack. He is unique. But he has to learn to fit into a social setting - that he can’t be the centre of attention all the time; that he can’t have it all his own way; that he shouldn’t take what people do and say, so keenly, to heart. Does he have the tools for that ? We trying to model it at home as best we can. You provide a framework at school which synchronizes (we hope) with what we say at home. I cannot control his responses. I cannot force him to behave in a certain way – without manacles and a heavy sedative. But I can try and shape his environment, and in this I appeal to you to help me: please help him to feel accepted.
Please can we all try, together, to aid him in this.
Yours Faithfully,
------------------------------------------------------------------------
There it is. Upset and traumatized mummy writes a letter to the Head Teacher and Class Teacher. Things are completely over-dramatized, I am accusatory, I am taking this very personally. yeah yeah yeah.
Get in line. Being a Mum is f**king hard work
Friday, June 14, 2013
muddling along
So how are my gorgeous boys doing ? yes, they're fine. It's all swings and round-abouts with kids, isn't it ? A few days last week were not so great, and one evening this week was awful, but overall things are fine and they're lovely kids. Typical boys : they're full of 'bounce', always falling over one another like puppies, lots of horse-play, kicking balls, having sword fights, splashing one another in the bath, and the conspiratorial whispering too :)
A few happy photos below
A few happy photos below
 |
| butter wouldn't melt.... |
 |
| a recent addition to the train set. an enormous station |
 |
| "I want the nail polish to be a pattern Mommy" |
 |
| iPad addicts |
 |
| playing with my "girlfriend" Meggie |
Friday, May 17, 2013
oh! the Tantrums, the tantrums, the @£$%^ tantrums
what a week it has been. 7year old has gone for the "Big Daddy" approach - kill mommy with tantrums and freaking out. Monday was the worst day, Tuesday was a bit better, Wednesday we ramped it up again, Thursday was passable, and Friday (sorry Wham, it wasn't the best day!) was the doppio day. All he wants is attention, but @£$%!£ hell. The method is driving me mental. I don't even want to see him after this week, but I've got the whole weekend ahead of me.
Sigh
Sigh
Sigh
Trying to remember that I'm the adult. Do not get involved in any arguments with the CHILD. Walk away. Don't get embroiled. Don't blow a gasket.
Sigh
Sigh
Sigh
Trying to remember that I'm the adult. Do not get involved in any arguments with the CHILD. Walk away. Don't get embroiled. Don't blow a gasket.
Wednesday, May 08, 2013
it's time to go
Oh joy of joys ! There is nothing quite like going to collect your children from a play date. "Pick up time" : it sows dread in the heart of even the strongest mother. I just despise it - you forewarn them that it's going to happen, you tell them that when you arrive we are going to have to leave. You try and manage their expectations, but there's still the wailing and gnashing of teeth at 'home time'. It drives me to distraction.
One is physically too strong for me to force out of the house and too heavy to pick up. The other goes for a different tack - he attacks his friend as we're about to leave. Is there some weird need for attention? Are they trying to get back at me, for calling an end to the fun ? yes. that's it.
THEY'RE ONLY CHILDREN
One is physically too strong for me to force out of the house and too heavy to pick up. The other goes for a different tack - he attacks his friend as we're about to leave. Is there some weird need for attention? Are they trying to get back at me, for calling an end to the fun ? yes. that's it.
THEY'RE ONLY CHILDREN
Thursday, April 18, 2013
money matters
I have opened bank accounts for both children now. I decided to go to Santander as they're local and we have our mortgage with them. I seldom use a high street bank, but convenience is important and you have to start somewhere. Zack has seized the idea with both hands - already deposited £15.50 into his account (from pocket money and tooth fairy savings), and has acquired a further £10 + while we were on holiday which he's ready to deposit. He has such a generous spirit : yesterday we went to the bank at 5:20pm to discover it closes at 5pm, so we crossed the road and went for a Starbucks. I'd paid for drinks and a nibble each, but then he insisted on buying Calvin a further lollypop and himself a biscuit - with the money he had in his purse (which was en-route to the now, closed bank). And then insisted on buying a bag of crisps for me. Bless him, he has a very giving nature.
My attitude | Their attitude
While in the USA on holiday (Spring Break / Easter hols), I genuinely struggled with their ingratitude. It's so difficult when you're away from home, living in different accommodation every night, eating out or having take-aways for at least 2 meals a day. On the one hand I'm delighted that they're confident and and can ask anyone for help or assistance; on the other hand, their attitude of 'this is what I want, and I want it now' really erked me. The transition from lower middle class in my childhood, to the affluent upbringing that our children are having is a difficult one to navigate. You want your children to realise the value of things : not just money, but what goes into a holiday, the value of labour, the value of these unique experiences. We will be in South Africa for all of August and I'm thinking very seriously of spending a few days at an orphanage in Soweto with a friend of mine so that they can see first-hand what it is to have no parents, no toys, in need.
Zack has been studying "Fairtrade" at school, and seems to have an understanding of poverty. It chimes with his generosity, it's true. I'd like to flesh that out a bit though.
Calvin is still a very self-contained little boy. I did however have an insight into his personality while we were away, thanks to Greg's comments. Calvin really looks up to Zack - hero worship - and feels very protective of him. So when Zack has a tantrum, it's Calvin who 'feels' the agony/frustration. There is a symbiosis there which we, as parents, are not plugged into. I hadn't recognised it until we were out of our normal environment, and I think I don't see it at home because Calvin is so quiet in himself. My eyes have been opened, and I will now be looking to him as a barometer of Zack's emotional well-being.
at Huntsville Alabama, the national Space & Rocket Centre
My attitude | Their attitude
While in the USA on holiday (Spring Break / Easter hols), I genuinely struggled with their ingratitude. It's so difficult when you're away from home, living in different accommodation every night, eating out or having take-aways for at least 2 meals a day. On the one hand I'm delighted that they're confident and and can ask anyone for help or assistance; on the other hand, their attitude of 'this is what I want, and I want it now' really erked me. The transition from lower middle class in my childhood, to the affluent upbringing that our children are having is a difficult one to navigate. You want your children to realise the value of things : not just money, but what goes into a holiday, the value of labour, the value of these unique experiences. We will be in South Africa for all of August and I'm thinking very seriously of spending a few days at an orphanage in Soweto with a friend of mine so that they can see first-hand what it is to have no parents, no toys, in need.
Zack has been studying "Fairtrade" at school, and seems to have an understanding of poverty. It chimes with his generosity, it's true. I'd like to flesh that out a bit though.
Calvin is still a very self-contained little boy. I did however have an insight into his personality while we were away, thanks to Greg's comments. Calvin really looks up to Zack - hero worship - and feels very protective of him. So when Zack has a tantrum, it's Calvin who 'feels' the agony/frustration. There is a symbiosis there which we, as parents, are not plugged into. I hadn't recognised it until we were out of our normal environment, and I think I don't see it at home because Calvin is so quiet in himself. My eyes have been opened, and I will now be looking to him as a barometer of Zack's emotional well-being.
Wednesday, March 13, 2013
farewell full fat milk
Zack will be turning 7 in just a few days time, and Calvin is 4 1/2. More and more they've been using the 'green' milk (milk labels in the UK are green for semi-skimmed, blue for full fat, and red for fat free). I've decided to stop buying the full-fat milk now. They're both well and truly onto solids, and I don't think there's much need to be buying two different kinds of milk anymore. I haven't done any reading about it - ignorance is bliss. Perhaps I should ? who has time...
Wednesday, February 06, 2013
he did it ! pulled them out all by himself
incredibly, Zack has pulled out both his front teeth himself. In one weekend!
the toothfairy is still absolutely rubbish at time-keeping. She took two days on both occasions to show up - disgraceful. Ah well, such is life in a busy family with exhausted parents. He got £2 per tooth, as the they're both front teeth. He was delighted to add this to his growing collection of pounds and pence.
He is now telling me what he can and cannot afford in shops, as he has £16 !!
I think Keith's discussion worked
the toothfairy is still absolutely rubbish at time-keeping. She took two days on both occasions to show up - disgraceful. Ah well, such is life in a busy family with exhausted parents. He got £2 per tooth, as the they're both front teeth. He was delighted to add this to his growing collection of pounds and pence.
He is now telling me what he can and cannot afford in shops, as he has £16 !!
I think Keith's discussion worked
our wonky smile after pulling out the first one
the tooth in question, about to be sent to file 13
Sunday, January 20, 2013
earning potential
We shop at a local grocery store - Sainsbury's. It's a huge chain in Britain. Our local shop has a community feel about it, beyond the soulless black plastic crates that mark Sainsbury's national fresh produce sections, and the awful silver shelving that is the same. We go in and out daily picking up a few items. Zack (now 6 3/4yrs) and Calvin (4 1/4yrs) used to be on first name terms with the security guard at the front door, until they changed staff. Today while we were packing our bags, the boys were running hither and thither collecting blue shopping baskets and stacking them up.
When we left, Zack piped up saying, "When I'm big, I want to be a Sainsbury's man. I want to do the packets."
Calvin chimed in saying, "When I'm big, I also want to be a Sainsbury's man. But I want to do the boxes."
Keith couldn't let it go, and so began a long discussion with Zack on earnings. What does he think a man at Sainsbury's earns ? etc.
Zack started off saying that he must work very hard if he wants to earn £500/day at Sainsbury's. Keith said he very much doubted that the man at Sainsbury's earned £500/day.
I wasn't privy to the rest of the conversation, chasing Calvin down the snowy pavement, but I bet it was interesting. I wonder what Zack thinks ?
When we left, Zack piped up saying, "When I'm big, I want to be a Sainsbury's man. I want to do the packets."
Calvin chimed in saying, "When I'm big, I also want to be a Sainsbury's man. But I want to do the boxes."
Keith couldn't let it go, and so began a long discussion with Zack on earnings. What does he think a man at Sainsbury's earns ? etc.
Zack started off saying that he must work very hard if he wants to earn £500/day at Sainsbury's. Keith said he very much doubted that the man at Sainsbury's earned £500/day.
I wasn't privy to the rest of the conversation, chasing Calvin down the snowy pavement, but I bet it was interesting. I wonder what Zack thinks ?
Thursday, January 03, 2013
kids say...
So we're walking along the snow covered pavement in France, carrying skiis, poles, and all the other paraphernalia involved in going downhill fast. Calvin looks at the ground where someone has carefully scattered black grit, and says "Look Mom! Lemon and poppyseed!"
how cute is that ?
how cute is that ?
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