Wondering why I've been SSOOOOOoooooo quiet ? Don't wonder. Things have been pretty i.n.s.a.n.e. here. I feel massively insecure about "talking" about it... When you talk about it, it's like confessing. When you confess it implies that you've done something wrong - that you've failed. But really we're in a situation something of our own making, but also of our child's manufacture. Nature v Nurture. You've heard it before. There is a teetering see-saw that sometimes slams down onto the ground, but then other times you're cruising and you think it's going to be okay until the next slam. Basically we're just trying to tag one another and stay calm, deal with the tantrums, our own feelings of panic, the school's seeming acts of sabotage, people's impatience, other children's cruelty, the frustration, anger, highs and lows. He's only 8, he's only 8... we keep saying to ourselves, but yes... he's only eight years old. Anyone who meets him thinks he's 10 even 11. He's tall, he's big. He "seems" to be older than he really is. But he's only 8.
How do I tell people this ? I can't go to each person. Individually. and have the whole conversation with them. But how do I protect him ? He needs us to be his "shield", to care for him, to protect him from the world - people's unkindness, selfishness, insensitivity, judgemental-ness...
Yes, that's what it comes down to - being judged. Are you judging me because my kid is "different" ? Are you judging me because he's "difficult" ? People tell me he's bright. He's very intelligent.
I look at his peer group and they're all exhibiting this nasty attitude problem. Apparently 8 year olds have a 'testosterone blip' which makes them aggressive and full of anxiety. It's a time of sifting for them, but bloody hell, it's a time of sifting for THE entire FAMILY.
Tired. Alot of the time.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment